Which activities make you lose track of time?
THE WALNUT SHELL OF CONSCIOUSNESS
By BoJenn
There isn’t a day, now at seventy-two, when I don’t lose time.
Most mornings, I wake and must first remember the season.
It takes a retracing of memories—yesterday’s thoughts—
and even then, they often slip away again.
This is the joy and wonder of aging:
curling slowly back into the walnut shell
of our consciousness and present existence.
As one begins to die,
the process accelerates—
disease wrapping tighter,
faster than the day before
and the day before that.
The shell hardens.
And yet,
within that shell,
we find a curious comfort—
a nesting place for our being.
We are that being,
centered deep in the walnut of consciousness,
held tight by memory,
by dreams of who we were
and whispers of who we still may become.
At first, we fight the shell.
It feels small.
Limiting.
A prison to what we’ve gained.
We fear the loss of our gifts—
this life’s unique blessings—
as they drift into imagination,
dissolving into nothingness.
And we sleep.
Upon awakening,
we dream again.
We find ourselves within that shell once more—
but perhaps it’s changed.
Maybe now it’s a Brazilian nut.
And we laugh—
A hazelnut.
Or no nut at all—
but a pineapple seed,
nourishing the jungle of enlightenment.
joyful at the green leaves
beaming from shadow,
in the jungle of our creative imagination.
When we’re ready,
the next cycle begins.
We carry only what is needed
for the next adventure.
You and I—
we remember what it was like,
encapsulated in the walnut shell.
How much we longed to escape it.
And now we understand
why we’re here—
living in the now.
No one wants to rot inside their shell.
No.
We move forward—
always—
with the revolutions and rhythms
of a fractal state of being.
My Art
My Near Death Experience Arts and Thoughts 