DARVO is an acronym used in psychology and abuse-analysis to describe a common manipulation tactic:
Deny
Attack
Reverse Victim and Offender
What it looks like
Deny – The person denies the behavior outright. “That never happened.” Attack – They attack the credibility, character, or motives of the person raising the concern. “You’re crazy / too sensitive / always causing drama.” Reverse Victim and Offender – They present themselves as the real victim and cast the actual harmed person as the abuser. “I’m the one being mistreated here.”
Where it shows up
Interpersonal abuse (emotional, physical, sexual) Narcissistic or authoritarian dynamics Politics, institutions, and public scandals Workplace conflicts when power is threatened
Why it’s effective
It creates confusion and self-doubt It derails accountability It shifts attention away from the original harm It pressures the harmed person into defending themselves instead of being heard
How to respond (briefly)
Name the behavior: “This is denial and reversal.” Stay anchored to facts, not tone attacks Avoid over-explaining or defending your character Document and disengage when possible
DARVO isn’t a debate style—it’s a deflection strategy. Recognizing it is often the first step in breaking its power.
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